When you google Sugar Daddy Scam online, you get the complete opposite of what you expect. You find a lot of links for men (sugar-daddy) scamming younger women (sugar-babies) or older people offering to pay off debt and then scamming something in return as in this article.
This is probably not what actually happens most of the time. The sugar baby is not the person with money. The sugar daddy is and has the most to loose.
Although the above article may be true, often quite the opposite actually happens where the sugar baby is the scammer.
I know first hand where the opposite is actually true. Being a victim myself of this act on my husband almost completely destroyed both of us and our marriage.
Media doesn’t portray this because how dare they paint the true picture. How dare they show that women can actually be scam artists themselves. And men can be the victim
and are in fact usually the victim here. In fact, even the police have a condescending attitude towards men possibly being victimized by this act. And that is probably why this is hardly even approached both by media and by police.
Here is how it goes. The female (the younger sugar baby), who has usually grown up in poverty, prostitution and drugs, finds a the male victim (the sugar daddy). Often she is on social assistance but supplements herself with prostitution. At first she offers her services for payment (prostitution) to the potential sugar daddy.
Once she has his number she texts and calls him continually to borrow money. The male, of course submits to this damsel in distress because often for any decent male, they want to be able to help those women in need. And this can be especially rewarding to him if he has a very independent, self-sufficient, hard working wife.
After a few weeks or months, when the sugar baby discovers the sugar daddy has a regular wage or money stream, she asks him to either become her boyfriend or even move in.
In our case, because I was working away from home two weeks at a time, this was easy for my husband who was missing my company and was growing tired of his current work circumstances.
This solidifies the relationship in the sugar daddy’s mind. And the sugar baby starts to drain his savings, his paychecks and starts to force him to start selling some of his property to pay for her drug habits.
By now the sugar daddy realizes that she is only using him for money. The sex has decreased to almost nothing. Arguments ensue almost hourly. And the sugar daddy is starting to feel more trapped than he thought he was before.
At first just threats to tell his wife are made by the sugar baby. But soon they become extortion. The sugar baby threatens to have someone hurt his wife if he doesn’t comply.
Often by now the wife knows, as property is disappearing, money is missing. And if she is not working away, the husband is visible away more and more. Maybe she is even receiving threats from the sugar baby itself. Or the sugar baby has tried to get her fired from her job.
But for the sugar baby, it is all about money. Sometimes they can manipulate thousands of dollars in just a short time. Often the money is being injected straight into their arm or up their nose by means of illegal drugs.
And if the sugar daddy has any amount of depression (which probably sent him in that direction to begin with), he just falls inline with it out of fear for what could happen to his family because of his choices. Eventually it could lead to suicide or attempted suicide.
Usually the sugar baby has at least one real boyfriend in tow. Some times several. And sometimes she may even have several sugar daddies at her disposal. It’s all in how to play the game.
The problem is, the police will not investigate the theft, extortion and fraud properly because of the “Guilty by association attitude” that all cops possess. And as I said earlier, this is why the police refuse to investigate properly. In their perspective, the man deserved what he got.
So walking away from the lost money and property is all they can do. Relocating to a new community is the best remedy.
In our case, the sugar baby managed to extort, steal and fraudulently take close to $20,000 in a few short months. Not only that, she told
my husband that she ordered a beat down on me one night when I caught her selling our property online. And she was secretly trying to get pregnant with my husband so she could manipulate child support from him.
She knew that he had investments, she tried to force him to divorce him to sever my cut of it not realizing all assets and debt were a part of our marriage.
Where are we today? Yes, we went through marital counselling, Natural BioEnergetics and long hours of working it all out. Except for the missing money which is now forcing us to delay our retirement, our marriage is doing much better.
I may get a lot of static for posting something like this but I have since discovered that this is more prominent than you think. I have heard of several cases since.
Apparently, there are many young sugar babies pulling this scam. And no one talks about it. Police are so hepped up on catching the Jon’s that they protect the scam artists themselves. No I am not saying that the Jon’s are right. To some degree if they get scammed, they deserve it. But their family’s are the real victims…..they never asked for it.
Often there is an underlying reason why the jon’s looked elsewhere. Marital failure, depression, an independent self-sustaining wife, or maybe they feel like they are a failure in bed. The point is, they were looking for help in the wrong place.
I am not trying to discredit the sugar daddy for all his failures. He has probably done a good job of that himself. But if he is feeling inadequate, I want to encourage him to find help in the right place before he becomes a victim like this. And before he puts his family at risk and in a place where everyone refuses to help them as well.
Counselling, Natural BioEnergetic, and more is available to these gentlemen. You are a better man if you seek out help for your feelings than going you are by going to the wrong place.